Vaginal Sex 101

Handy tips for (vaginal) sex

Vaginal sex is the type of sex that involves a penis going into a vagina. Unsure on the mechanics of how it works? These basic Penis In Vagina pointers could be helpful! 

Consent is sexy

The first and most important stage of vaginal – or any other kind – of sex, is that both you and your sex buddy consent to having sex. A big YES is far more important at the beginning of sexytime than it is at the end; and never forget that at any point, either before or during sex, you can always change your mind and stop.

Focus on Foreplay

Not only is foreplay a lot of fun, it’s pretty instrumental in making you both aroused – and unless the vagina is fully aroused and wet, vaginal sex is difficult to achieve and a pretty uncomfortable sensation. But don’t worry if you’re struggling to get wet – there are a huge range of lubricants that can help with that. Enjoy exploring what you and your partner like, and don’t feel pressured into rushing to the next stage!

Let’s get it on

Once you’re both aroused, it’s a good idea to put a condom on the penis, to prevent an unwanted pregnancy and protect you both against STIs – and do this before the penis goes anywhere near the vagina, as pre-come contains sperm. If you need it, put some lube near the entrance of the vagina (and make sure it’s water-based if you’re using condoms, as oil-based lubes can mess with the latex). Then when you’re ready, gently open (or ‘spread’) the labia and insert the head of the penis into the vagina. Take it slowly at first – there’s nothing worse than pushing too hard too fast – then move at a pace that’s comfortable for both of you. And remember to communicate! If it’s painful or uncomfortable, let your partner know, and slow things down. 

Switch it up

There are loads of different positions for having vaginal sex. Some positions give easier access to the clitoris during sex, and others allow for a greater depth of penetration. If you’re having vaginal sex for the first time you may find the missionary position (where one of you is on top of the other), is the easiest to get to grips with, but as you get more comfortable with sex figuring out what works for you can be a lot of fun. Fumble will have more information on the different sexual positions coming soon!

Winding down

When you decide to stop having sex – which can be when one or both of you have come – gently remove the penis from the vagina. If you’re using condoms, hold the condom at the base of the penis while you take it out to make sure no cheeky sperm leaks out. Then tie the condom it in a knot, wrap it in tissue and throw it away. It’s also a good idea for both of you to go for a wee after having sex, to avoid contracting painful urinary infections such as cystitis.


Ultimately, always remember that good sex is a learning process. No-one is great at sex when they first start having it – and even people who have been happily shagging around for years have the occasional hilarious and awkward moment. So try not to worry about ‘getting it wrong’, but enjoy exploring and learning! Happy PIV.

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